As Fox News commentators once again this year argue that heavy winter weather on the US East Coast is evidence that the Earth is not warming, Transition Voice has developed the Beck-Hannity-Limbaugh Global Warming Truth Index.
Using current local weather to give a thumbs-up or thumbs-down to the whole theory of global climate change will no longer require talent on loan from God. Now it will be a matter of science.
Cold, snowy winter raises questions
Recently, Fox News commentator Tucker Carlson, who has dubbed global warming “a religion, and one with particularly fervent believers,” declared that heavy winter storms on the US East Coast were proof that climate change was a liberal hoax.
This follows on from last winter, when fellow Fox commentators Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity said the same about a snowstorm that hit the nation’s capital in February. As Hannity put it:
And tonight’s “Meltdown” is brought to you by the D.C. snow storm, you know, the storm that dumped about two feet of snow on the Washington area over the weekend causing thousands of power outages and keeping many people home from work today. And it’s the most severe winter storm in years, which would seem to contradict Al Gore’s hysterical global warming theories.
While scientists say that climate change will bring more extreme winter weather, Fox News commentators aren’t buying it. “Either warmer or colder. Make up your mind. Which is it?” they ask.
And, committed as they are to empirical proof, these TV personalities insist on judging global climate by the weather outside their own studio windows.
Using the new Beck-Hannity-Limbaugh Index, now Transition Voice readers can do them one better and judge global climate by the weather in the three towns where Glenn, Sean and Rush were born. It’s a fair and balanced approach.
The science behind the numbers
A fusion of entertainment and enlightenment, the Global Warming Truth Index combines average temperatures from the hometowns of Fox News commentators Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh. Then, the index compares the current month’s temperatures in the hometowns to historical averages for all three cities. All weather data comes from regional offices of the National Weather Service.
Using this methodology, combined Fox commentator hometown temperatures in December 2010 were 5.6 degrees Fahrenheit cooler than in the past. Based on this data, the inescapable conclusion is that…
…is a hoax!
|Commentator||Hometown||Dec. 2010||Dec. avg.||Difference|
|Beck||Mt. Vernon, WA||40.5°F||38.0°F||+2.5°F|
|Hannity||New York, NY||32.8°F||37.3°F||-4.5°F|
|Limbaugh||Cape Girardeau, MO||30.3°F||33.9°F||-3.6°F|
|Combined total for all three hometowns||-5.6°F|
|Dec. 2010 was COOLER than average in the Fox News personalities’ hometowns.|
CONCLUSION: Global warming = HOAX.
“Since it was cooler in December 2010 in the three TV commentators’ hometowns than in Decembers past, it means that global warming is clearly a hoax,” said Erik Curren, publisher of Transition Voice.
The Beck-Hannity-Limbaugh Global Warming Truth Index will be calculated every month by a grid of Cray XT5 Jaguar supercomputers housed in the Transition Voice data center, a blast-proof bunker carved into solid granite 500 feet underneath Thomas Jefferson’s head on Mt. Rushmore in the Black Hills of South Dakota.
“It may indeed turn out that some month in the future is warmer than the historical average in the three Fox TV personalities’ hometowns,” said Curren. “In that case, the theory of global warming will be validated, at least for the following 30 days. Of course, the data could go either way. But hey, that’s science.”
— Transition Voice